Fingerling clouds rest on the peaks of the Olympics which, in the setting sun, are becoming a silhouette of themselves with each dimming second.
The wispy underside of the cottony frame presents a pastel kaleidoscope of descending hues,yellowish pink into pale lavender, then dark gray, dissipating themselves under the ever brightening stars.
A green styrofoam noodle covers the front of me. Each end is tucked under an armpit. I am bobbing. Mind you the name I have given to this ritual I’ve come to love is ‘Sunset Swims’. Truth be told, it is a far distance from the long, strong strokes and rhythmic breathing hefted in the early morning hours that kept me in touch with myself when my children were young.
A celebration of another day of life, bobbing begins in the deep end. Head tilted back, eyes closed , facing west, legs rotating as if I am riding a unicycle, arms sway back and forth to reverse the chance of forward motion. I stay in the hot spot of the sun by feel.
Water has traditionally been the symbol of rebirth. Now? Rebirth at the end of the day? Rebirth before sleep? Taking the events of the day I wash them in water and dry them in the heat of the setting sun. I fold them and put them away, lest I wear the same particles of release two days in a row.
Change, personal growth,and spiritual maturation are such slippery little learning curves. Higher and deeper in we circle each time. Self concept, self esteem, family dynamics, our definitions of love, success, disease, and normal, all flex and ebb, crack and heal, as life throws us curve balls and blessings.
The summer of 2013 will forever be remembered in my head and heart as the months I accepted uncertainty and counted my blessings.
In May, just previous to this season, a friend gave me a small tile with the word ‘surrender’ etched in it. She meant for me to find God’s dream for me. I did...right after I declared to God, it was not MY dream for myself. Nonetheless I began to agree ,in obedience,and floodgates of opportunity opened.
In doing so I discovered God wanted me to stop moving back and forth and just bob at sunset, get a good night’s rest and finish every creative project without starting anything new.
It’s dark now. My skin is pruned. My Spirit has swallowed the last morsel of light. The smile on my face comes from some ancient place of praise for the privilege of being a live human being.
I have returned to ground simply by staying in one place and letting light and water lead me into the darkness that will usher in a new day.
Amen and amen.